Okay!

I'm back from Rockhampton, Queensland. Its a nice place and all, but i only got to see civilisation for about 2 days in australia. The rest were spend in the bush, grassland and whatever one would call the australian wilderness.

And while out in the field, during endless dry powerpoint presentations in the day, and enduring the bitter cold with insufficient clothing in the night. Our tents back in the base camp burnt down. 20 tents to be exact. Everything not made of metal or stone turned into CO2 and various other gases.

Everything burnt down so quickly. In some places, it took as long as 5mins!

ACE SETS THE BLAZE!

Needless to say, everyone was upset. Expensive bags, pricey shoes and belts, Ipods, mobiles, wallets, cash, credit cards, items of sentimental value, and ONE portable dvd player. Why was there a dvd player, i don't know. But he's a funky guy. The one who brought the dvd player.

Till now, there's no word about any compensation for the lost items. No speculation was allowed either. Draconian but thats the army for you.

And priceless quotes such as "Lucky your tent burn down ah, not mine, i feel so blessed."

Coming from quite a high ranking officer, imagine the blow to everyone's morale. Of course, the offending person shall not be named to protect myself from the Army's underhanded way of treating people who say bad things about them.

And now that i'm back home, the smell of this country has ignited a quest to quell the little demons in me. They're called, "Food Cravings". Quest is in progress currently.

Out.

And so, i'm back from ex wallaby.

All i can say is, ACE SETS THE BLAZE!

I have decided to stay with my love.

New friends can be made, and my love should be made part of my life.

Looks like i cannot be stone.

I don't know what to feel. I'm jaded, i'm irritate, i'm angry, yet, i'm also very sad. So many conflicting emotions. Angry at myself, angry at my situation. Yet helpless in many ways, due to the nature of my location, and also the nature of the Army, all in all, the nature of my situation.

Yet, i cannot blame anything else except myself. I caused this. I made a decision i'm starting to regret. But i cannot change my mind. I'm too ashamed, and i'm also too jaded because i'm stuck in between. I hate choosing, because i want everything. I'm also willing to throw away everything.

But now, i look back...

I wasn't sure. We were happy, i was happy other than the fact that i couldn't meet my female friends without her, and i hardly had any time alone. I enjoy her company, but suddenly i see my friends disappearing.

I'm just selfish. I feel like crying.

18 days left till my reappearance in singapore. Thats if nothing goes wrong. I should set everything back in place. I should make everything be right.

if you wondered why i don't want to bring you on outings with my female friends, thats because sometimes we will talk in a way that you might not like, i shouldn't have to restrain myself when i'm with my friends right? Yet, they're just friends. No matter. Now you know.

i don't know what i want now. conflict. somebody tell me what to want. sms/tag/email.

But i wonder if people are still trying to visit the xiew.blogspot.com . Oh well, no way of informing the uninformed now.

If i had a rifle and rounds now, i'd go shoot kangaroos.

Currently in SWBTA, Samuel Hill camp. Also known as Sam Hell Camp.

Its dusty, and there are some giant biting flies known as march flies.

I hate it here. 23 days left.